YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
