I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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