They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
