we're chasing vodka with high fives
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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