What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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