its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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