Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
