Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Randomize
