Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
