just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
