Dude my mom stole all your condoms
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I just gift wrapped bread.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
