I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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