I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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