Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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