yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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