are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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