totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
