I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Bring me that man meat
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
