awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
