you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
