I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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