Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
