Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
nutella sex= disaster
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm way too hungover for life right now
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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