Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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