just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
