Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
