i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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