I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize