so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
