dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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