it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize