yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
