You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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