just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
