just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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