is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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