Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
She said her name was "party"
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
