It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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