You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
