all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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