HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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