I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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