i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
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