My hair reeks of homosexuality.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
