i need an iv and a liver transplant
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
