If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
