Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
