she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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