where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
