And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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