yea but for you.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
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She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
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That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!