kristin has been a bad kristin
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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